siLLy puPPy NÖDUTGÅNG:SJÄLVMORD may look unpronounceable unless your Swedish of course. While this band comes from Poltava, Ukraine, it chose the Swedish name which means “Emergency Exit: Suicide.” This band formed in 2009 and has so far released one album and one EP. This is a trio that includes Nagifar (vocals, bass), Alex Veil (guitar) and Deadman (drums).

This debut ALL COLOURS OF RAINBOW was released before the following EP “Mourning Poems.” NÖDUTGÅNG:SJÄLVMORD is one of the many depressive black metal bands that combines the traditional Shining type depressive metal with the more modern blackgaze as heard in bands like Deafhaven. ALL COLOURS RAINBOW features seven tracks and the album almost hits 35 minutes.

There are certainly some creepy sounds coming from the Ukraine these days but this ain’t one of them. On the contrary, NÖDUTGÅNG:SJÄLVMORD is one of the goofiest black metal bands i’ve ever fucking heard! While based on the textbook depressive black metal guitar riffs that adds some lazy drumming and repetitive cyclical riffing, the bass is much more energetic than the average band of this sort and once the guitar riffs drop out it becomes more obvious that the more melodic than average procession for depressive melody is actually culled from The Cure.

The gothic aspects are even more apparent when the Dracula vocals emerge however what makes this album really ridiculous are the tortured clown vocals of Naglfar whose over-the-top tantrums sound like a spoiled little tot who didn’t get a candy bar at the grocery store and who happens to sound like a pissed off clown with a plugged up nose! While this is supposed to simulate a depressive black metal album, the melodic features aren’t very depressive at all.

In fact the entire album is as silly as the amateurish album cover. The closing “Last Sentimental Words” is the perfect example of this hilarious blackened clown metal at its worst. The highly melodic bass run simulates an 80s Cure song while a tortured castrato Krusty the clown screams with clean vocals harmonizing up and down the operatic scales. LOL.

Along for the ride are catchy guitar solos and uplifting atmospheres. The whole thing is unbelievable really. What saves this from a one star rating is the music is pretty catchy and there is a humor value but this has to be the worst depressive black metal album i’ve ever heard really but at least i can say it is not a copycat generic clone! Clown maybe but no clone. I guess in one way this does make you want to commit suicide but i think it would be more effective as a torture device for unsuspecting kvlt black metal purists. Hehe