DREAM THEATER — The Astonishing (review)

DREAM THEATER — The Astonishing album cover Album · 2016 · Progressive Metal Buy this album from MMA partners
0.5/5 ·
Cylli Kat
Dream Theater The ASSEATISHING review № Stardate 11810.19...

Wow!!! Everything that Dream Theater could've done wrong they did do wrong on this remarkably horrendous pile of puerile, juvenile dreck.

After being endlessly assaulted on facebook every 28 seconds with some new bit of "blah, blah, blah", about this album (I'm talking about during its initial release days), I unfriended all the band members and unliked/unfollowed the band.

I literally thought: 'Whats next? A video game, a graphic novel, a CGI movie?!?!?' Not knowing I was actually close to the mark on that one...

This is so beyond dreadful. I've tried repeatedly to garner some type of appreciation for this album; but as of this writing the only thing I'm willing to do with the discs are turn them into coasters...

Completely vapid, inane, & banal concept, hyper-overdone virtuostic masturbation with the inimitable Dream Theater (when in extreme bad taste mode) aplomb.

This is what happens when you write an album to appeal to little girls who believe in Unicorns and play with My Little Pony®...

Time for Dream Theater to get back to making good music again...

Or, it's time for them to retire...

Believe me; I wanted to go on a song by song tirade, but I literally don't think I could bear to hear this album ever again, so, I scrapped that idea...

A great big fat ZERO on my personal scale. Forced to give it 1 star due to the PA rating process.

As always, your mileage may vary,

Grace and peace, Cylli (Jim Calistro)

Originally posted at progarchives.com
Share this review

Review Comments

Post a public comment below | Send private message to the reviewer
Please login to post a shout
Cylli Kat wrote:
19 days ago
This is what happens when you write an album to appeal to little girls who believe in Unicorns and play with My Little Pony®...
Bosh66 wrote:
23 days ago
I get you, Jim. I've tried very hard to like this album but still struggle to sit through it.

Review Index

Member Zone

Username:
Password:
Stay signed in

Metal Subgenres

Artists Alpha-index

MMA TOP 5 Metal ALBUMS

Rating by members, ranked by custom algorithm
Albums with 30 ratings and more
Master of Puppets Thrash Metal
METALLICA
Buy this album from our partners
Moving Pictures Hard Rock
RUSH
Buy this album from our partners
Powerslave NWoBHM
IRON MAIDEN
Buy this album from our partners
Rust in Peace Thrash Metal
MEGADETH
Buy this album from our partners
Keeper of the Seven Keys Part II Power Metal
HELLOWEEN
Buy this album from our partners

New Metal Artists

New Metal Releases

Little By Little Hardcore Punk
MANSPANK
Buy this album from MMA partners
Dyatlov Metalcore
JONESTOWN
Buy this album from MMA partners
Metamorphose Metalcore
JILUKA
Buy this album from MMA partners
Sabbath Stoner Metal
MELVINS
Buy this album from MMA partners
Medicine Noose / Spewn Sludge Metal
SPEWN
Buy this album from MMA partners
More new releases

New Metal Online Videos

Cirith Ungol "I'm Alive" (Live)
CIRITH UNGOL
Tupan· 1 day ago
NAAM // STARCHILD
NAAM
Tupan· 5 days ago
PORTAL O CURTAIN
PORTAL
Tupan· 5 days ago
More videos

New MMA Metal Forum Topics

More in the forums

New Site interactions

More...

Latest Metal News

members-submitted

More in the forums

Social Media

Follow us

Buy Metal Music Online